How to be Yourself and Live Life on Your Own Terms

Curious as to who you really are as a person? Have you started to recognize that your environment is shaping you more than you are? I went through a long period in my life where I was everything to everyone but myself. I would wear what other people wanted me to, I would be interested in things other people were interested in, I would even go along with popular beliefs because they were the “conventional” way of thinking. I did all this with no regard for what I truly believed, what I stood for, or what my own personal style was.

This led me on a path to self-discovery with a strong desire to transform myself into the individual I knew I was supposed to be. I have shared some powerful techniques I’ve used over the years with you below. Please feel free to comment and until next time, stay prosperous.

How to be yourself - lady beach

Getting clear on who you are and what you want

In order to be yourself and live life on your own terms, you need to get clear on who you are and what you want. You first need to get clear on who you are as a person and what your “true purpose” is in life. What is your mission? What do you stand for? What impact are you going to make on this world? If you haven’t already read my posts on purpose and passion take a look here, How to Find your Purpose in Life – A Powerful Guide and here, Find your Passion by Asking these 13 questions.

Secondly you need to understand what you want in life. What exactly do you want? Financially, spiritually, emotionally, in relationships, etc. Then build the plan for this life out. What exactly do you want it to look like? All the way to, what will success feel like when you achieve it? If you haven’t already read my post around designing your dream life, you can do so here – How to Design the Life of your Dreams.

Be authentically you by not worrying about what other people think

This is a tough one for most people. Humans are social beings and the weight of someone else’s opinion weighs heavily on most people. However, if you want to live a life on your own terms, you need to get used to criticism and realize the criticism isn’t actually meant for you, it is meant for them.

You see, the majority of time, other people’s opinions and criticism of you are just opinions and criticism of themselves. They gave up at some point, they didn’t reach for the stars, they didn’t become obsessed with success, they couldn’t do it and they want to validate their decisions through your actions. Do not let them take you away from your goals and you living your best life.

Be obsessed by immersing yourself into your passion

Everyone has passions in life, however, not all passions are in your best interest. For example many people are passionate about eating out, fast food, drugs, video games, etc. Take some time to make a list of all of these passions or (compulsions) and sort out which one’s you would consider “in your best interest” and one’s you would consider “destructive” or a “distraction from being your true self.”

Now take these passions that are in your best interest and start to embody them more and more. Make them a part of you. Make them your essence. Make them the why you get up in the morning. What you will quickly find is, these passions that are in your best interest will begin to allow you express yourself more effectively, which will start to bring out the positive and authentic qualities of your being.

Live life on your own terms - mug mountain

Take your power back by removing all of your distractions

You’re probably thinking, how do you remove all distractions? Well, in its most simplistic form, you stop giving them attention. Think about how much time you spend everyday on social media, watching TV, complaining, appeasing your friends, shopping, gossiping about the news, celebrities, political tensions, etc. All of these things are distracting you from being “you”. Remove these distractions and shift your focus on the things that you stand for. The things that make you who you are. The things that encourage you to do good in this world and put a smile on other people’s face. These are the true characteristics that make up your being, not the distractions that are around you everyday influencing the way you think about the world and more importantly, think about yourself.

Control the people in your environment to eliminate doubt

What do I mean by control your environment? Quite simply, be cautious and control who and what you are surrounding yourself with. There’s a famous quote by Jim Rohn that states, “you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” This is such a powerful truth and it needs to be observed, embodied, and acted on. Do not allow the people around you to take you away from being yourself and living on your own terms. Most people would rather you “stay the same” because they “love you just the way you are”, as opposed to encouraging you to get better and live your best life.

Be yourself by speaking from the heart

Does it ever feel difficult just saying what you want to say? Have you been in a situation where you knew exactly what you should say at that time, however, you decided to not say it? This is a tough one for most people to get comfortable with, I personally struggled with this for years. 99% of the time, that voice in your head that is talking, is actually “you” trying to speak and you are holding back your words because you are afraid of confrontation or rejection. The easiest way to overcome this is to just be transparent. Say what’s on your mind. This may cause frustration or indifference in the short-term, however, it will allow you to speak your truth and start attracting people around you that have similar beliefs.

In Conclusion

While being yourself may seem like a chore at first, in it’s most simplistic form, it is actually just being authentic to who you are without worrying about other people’s opinions. Don’t worry if you do not appease someone else. Don’t worry if people who you thought were your friends don’t agree with you. There’s no need to worry about any of that. The only thing you should be thinking about is living the life of your dreams and doing it on your own terms. By doing this you will attract the right people, at the right place, and the right time. Everything will start to fall into place around you and the people you associate with will be those who support you and give you the courage to be yourself.

This certainly doesn’t happen overnight, however, the sooner you start making changes and embody the real “you”, the sooner you will start to see transformational results. I encourage everyone to start this journey today. Feel free to comment below and until next time, stay prosperous.

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